


Swearing

by Gelphie_Supercorp_Emisue_etc17



Category: Beetlejuice - All Media Types, Beetlejuice - Perfect/Brown & King
Genre: Adam’s a little baby, Anyways, BJ really likes speeches apparently hahah, Barbara swearssssss hahaha, Fluff and Humor, Lydia’s proud of our little baby Babs, barbara has a long full name, beetlelands, but he’s also smart lol, everyone is SHOCKED that Barbara swore, i don’t think they knew she could until now, i really don’t know what to put for tags honestly, she doesn’t let other people swear, so now everyone’s a little angry, the movie is mean girls lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:34:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23624710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gelphie_Supercorp_Emisue_etc17/pseuds/Gelphie_Supercorp_Emisue_etc17
Summary: “I didn’t say that!” Barbara exclaimed, after she fully processed what the teen had insinuated. The ghost crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow at Lydia.“Ummm, I hate to break it to you Babs, but you did,” Beetlejuice noted, everyone slowly nodding along with him.-OR-When Barbara’s hand catches on fire, she lets slip a word that no one thinks she’s really capable of. A little bit of chaos happens after that.
Relationships: Beetlejuice & Adam Maitland & Barbara Maitland, Beetlejuice/Adam Maitland/Barbara Maitland, Charles Deetz & Delia Deetz
Comments: 4
Kudos: 86





	Swearing

**Author's Note:**

> This is kinda short and I wrote it in one go sooooo sorry about any mistakes!! Hope this makes you feel better amongst Beetlejuice’s closing and everything! Love you guys and please stay safe!!<33 Hope you enjoy!!

“Oh shit!” Barbara gasped, pulling her hand quickly away from the fire. Flames that didn’t burn her skin crackled in her palm for a few moments before she blew it out. Sighing in relief, Barbara turned back around, ready to go back to the couch to snuggle with Adam and Beetlejuice.

Unfortunately, when she did, the ghost found the entire household staring at her, eyes wide and mouths hanging open. Judging from the fact that they had all been talking a few seconds earlier, Barbara took their silence as a bad sign. 

“Oh no,” she said, expression becoming worried and frantic. “What happened? Is everything alright? Please don’t tell me one of you—”

“Shut the fucking hell up Barbara Kerry Maitland!” Beetlejuice interrupted, his shocked face turning up into what would normally be described as an evil grin.

Barbara scoffed, putting her hands on her hips and frowning at the demon. “Excuse me, please watch your language, mister. Adam and Lydia are here.”

“Hey—”

“You’re one to talk, you little hypocrite,” Beetlejuice laughed, swinging one arm around Adam’s shoulders and propping his feet up on Lydia’s head. She quickly shoved him off before going back to staring at her ghost mom in complete and utter shock. “Do you realize what you just said?”

Suddenly, Barbara became worried again. She didn’t remember what she had said, and now she was beginning to think it was something bad. “N-no. . .”

Lydia perked up at this, doing her best impression of Delia as she spoke. “I believe what you said was, and I quote: ‘Oh shit!’”

_ “Lydia!” _ Charles and Barbara said in unison, making the girl shrink back and giggle at the same time. She even gave Beetlejuice a high five over her shoulder, to which Delia sent a glare their way.

“I didn’t say that!” Barbara exclaimed, after she fully processed what the teen had insinuated. The ghost raised an eyebrow at Lydia.

“Ummm, I hate to break it to you Babs, but you did,” Beetlejuice noted, everyone slowly nodding along with him.

Barbara gasped softly, the fire crackling behind her and threatening to catch her dress in the flames.

“Hey Barb,” Adam spoke up, pulling her out of her thoughts. “It’s okay. We all make mistakes sometimes.” He, of course, knew that she swore all the time now, but only in the privacy of the attic.

“Yes but that doesn’t excuse the fact that—”   
  


“That you’re a hypocrite Babs?” Beetlejuice finished for her, smirking up at her with that devilish grin of his.

Barbara sighed disappointedly, shaking her head and dropping her arms to her sides again. “That’s not what I was going to say.”

“But it’s true,” Lydia commented with a smile of her own.

“That is—”

“True,” Delia added from her place on the loveseat to the left, her legs tangled with Charles, heels still on despite the rules. “I mean, as my guru Otho always says; swearing is like—”

_ “NO!!”  _ Everyone in the room yelled simultaneously, effectively shutting the redhead up. For now at least.

“Come on you guys,” Barbara said, finally getting a word in among her crazy family. “It was one slip up, and it’s not like you guys don’t swear. It’s really not that big of a de—”

“HELL YES IT IS!” Beetlejuice yelled, jumping up from his seat on the couch, bouncing slightly on the cushions as he did so. “You, the woman nicknamed The Language Police, just swore in front of everyone in the house! This should be written in the history books people!!”

“On it,” Lydia added, getting up and running to her room to grab a pen and paper before rushing back. 

“This is a momentous occasion everyone,” the demon continued after Lydia had sat down again. He caused an embarrassed blush to rise in Barbara’s cold cheeks, despite being dead. “Today, October third, at the time of whatever day—”

“Nine forty two,” Adam supplied, checking his watch quickly.

“Thank you Mr. Sexy! At the time of nice forty two, in the year two thousand and whatever, doesn’t matter anyway,” Beetlejuice dismissed with a wave of his hand before Adam could interrupt again. “Barbara Kerry Genevieve Zinnia Maitland,” (Barbara was very impressed that he remembered her full name) “said the word _‘shit’_ in front of her entire family, for all of them to hear. Because of this, we will henceforth refuse to abide under her rule of no swearing! This speech is approved by everyone in the entire world and Netherworld!”

“Wha—”

“WOOHOOO YEEEAAHHH GO BEEJ!!!” Lydia cheered, bouncing in her seat and kicking her legs all around. She pumped her fist in the air and gave the demon another high five, beaming.

“Lydia this is not—” Charles tried.

“Hush my father, let me celebrate this national Maitland-Deetz holiday!” Lydia said loudly, speaking over his voice.

Barbara tried again, this time whistling to get everyone’s attention. When all of the eyes in the room were on her and all of the mouths were quiet, she finally spoke. “Listen up! I know that I swore, and I understand that rules feel dumb sometimes, but that is no reason to revolt like you idiots are doing! People, ghosts and demons make mistakes, alright? It happens, get over it! The rule is there to make it so that this house is not a mosh pit of people swearing every other word, and to help teach Lydia—and Beetlejuice—better manner. No offense Charles.”

“Oh, none taken.”

She nodded and shot him a quick smile. “I understand that I may have been a little harsh with the rules,” Barbara purposefully ignored the snorts of laughter and continued on confidently. “I see that now and will try to ease up. But that does not mean you don’t have to follow the rules. Okay? Does that make sense to everyone?”

“Mhmm,” Delia hummed.

“Yes,” Adam and Charles nodded.

“Sure,” Lydia pouted. She didn’t like it, but she was proud of Barbara standing up and taking initiative.

Barbara raised an eyebrow at the demon in front of her, placing her hands on her hips again. “Beetlejuice?” she inquired, her tone accusing.

He huffed and growled a bit before the demon eventually let up and mumbled, “Fine,” making Barbara smile brightly. “But only for you Babs, and your sexy, sexy husband.”

The Maitlands laughed, Barbara walking back over and cuddling into the demons side. “Are we all ready to re-start the movie now?” she asked jokingly.

“Yes!” Everyone exclaimed, making Barbara laugh again and hit play on the remote, the movie picking up from where it had stopped before.

_ “My T-shirt’s stuck to my sweater, isn’t it?” _

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked this little one shot! Stay safe everyone!!<33


End file.
